You've got Mail!

[witchplz]

"You've hit up Rahzel! Too bad you can't bask in my glorious presence right now. I mean- sorry I can't come to the phone right now, I'm probably off saving the world from giant naked cannibals or shopping till I drop. Leave me a message and I'll get right back to you! Have a good day~!"
BEEEeeeep!


Rahzel Anadis
#1446 Holly Heights
Bro
brooooo


[text] [calls] [physical mail (presents~] [action] [web stuff]

Comments

[witchplz]

we're just gonna need to airlock 'em at this point.

i know <3 as she should be. i understand. a spa day would be lovely! so relaxing and great for our pores, great to exfoliate and get ready for the next round of ass kicking.

PSH of course not! i intend to work him like a dog but for better pay of course. he provides me with much needed company and sometimes he takes out the trash, i let him open pickle jars sometimes. but i want him to rely on me too, equally. (not that i need him for the pickles of course)

well...theres no way to find out now. i like to believe it was, but being powerless sucks. i'll tell it, little by little. some day.

what about a dollop

[YOUR HAIR is out of context with THIS situation

they count on a scale of phenomenons at least

*blessed
fixed for you]

[symphonise]

i hope you mean toss them out the airlock.

all the relaxation and facial treatments will enhance our natural beauty and strengths. the world won't be able to handle us.

it sounds like you're a million times more reliable than he is. if there comes a time when he doesn't provide enough for you and takes away instead, tell me. you won't need me to step in, but i wouldn't mind giving him my two cents.

maybe i'll tell you a story someday, too. now's not the time for it.

not when you're using measurements that should only be used for whipped or sour cream.

[ wow rude!!! her hair is always in context!! your DAD is out of context with this situation!!!

yes, that can be conceded.

*biased and wrong
double fixed that for you ]

[witchplz]

absolutely! or at least tie them to something and put them out the airlock, then drag em back in when they swear even bolder loyalty.

the world is absolutely doomed with us at our absolute most beautiful and best.

well i wont disagree there when it comes to chores, but i really can count on him otherwise. he's a good listener and he's trying really hard to ensure we're both happy. and i am, so i'll try just as hard. i really appreciate it, nonon <3333 i'm glad i have a friend like you.

when the time does come, i'll be happy and ready to listen. no matter what.

a teaspoon????

[ok ok her hair is always perfect. your MONKEY HAT THING AS A CHILD IS OUT OF CONTEXT also ok ok ok okkk good point about the old man there is no disagreement here

*correct and all knowing, like the author
fixed it again for you~]

[symphonise]

if they're nerds worth their mettle, they'd have enough ingenuity to find their way back in.

we'll take the world by storm.

[ Whoa, friend is a strong word, Rahzel!!! Nonon isn't ready to admit anything! Jeez. ]

i'll have a baton at the ready just in case.

we'll see what time does for us and for you.

that might be the best measurement for you.

[ WOW DON'T BRING HER MONKEY INTO THIS!! You don't want Rayborn brought into this!!!

if the author is so correct and all knowing, why doesn't Rahzel ask Prez to tell her he likes her 100 million times?
*breaks ur heart for u ]

[witchplz]

true, like jetpacks in their underwear.

the neverending storm. the storm born!!

[theres no need to be afraid of this commitment, Nonon, no worries...she'll wait 4 u]

and i'll have my phone ready to record a video in case it ever does happen.

we will indeed. amazing things, either way, because we're us.

whats that supposed to mean =n=

[AT LEAST HER MONKEY IS ALIVE LIVING IN PARADISE!! HOW DARE YOU BRING UP RAYBORN ON THIS DAY!! YOU PROMISED

Baroqueheat is hereby sicc'd on you. immediately. release the horse seed hound.
GO TO HELL and no then she'd feel selfish, hmph, the finer things of romance]

[symphonise]

[ jetpacks in underwear could probably exist in kill la kill. nonon doesn't want to think of it. ]

that's not the kind of ingenuity i want.

[ she's not afraid!! god!! she's just... bad... with affection if you're not Satsuki. Or something. ]

we could do it for the vine.

and it means what you think it means. i didn't mince my words.

[ HER MONKEY IS ALIVE IN HER HEART. in reality he's in the same place rayborn is.... and I DIDN'T PROMISE ANYTHING

good lord get baroqueheat away we don't want him in this flavor text conversation. so rahzel should do it, too, and it can be a mutual thing. a relationship goal. and then she can go home and cry about her dead friend. ]

[witchplz]

how about AC systems? it'll keep em cool and composed, maybe. and at your mercy.

[oh no, nonon's so cute =u=]

i would gladly do it for the vine. it'll be a nice little bonus to my get rich and more powerful quick scheme.

i know you don't. and i appreciate that about you.

[ITS REALLY NOT ALIVE!?!? THATS SO SAD.....YOU PROMISED, YOU REALLY PROMISED!! her monkey and rayborn are friends, then...its probably made a home in his hair

nope HEEEEEEERES BAROQUEHEAT!! disgusting mess and all.
its time to take SOMEONE to church
and it isnt the happy couple
baroqueheat is going as well
looks at closely]

[symphonise]

how about nothing attached to their underwear except their underwear? it's less disgusting that way.

i thought your life scheme was to get buff quick, not rich and powerful.

as you should!

[ IT'S A SKULL IN HER HAT... it's not alive it's really not alive. it was alive in middle school flashbacks, but that's it. but rahzel had all of rayborn's hair chopped off. it's not enough to make an adequate home for the cute monkey. they can definitely be cute friends, though.

JUST BURIES BAROQUEHEAT INTO THE GROUND. lbr nonon would just blast away baroqueheat with the soundwaves of her goku uniform. no church, only imminent deafness. ]

[witchplz]

thats inhumane! i dont see a downside, sort of.

all of the above! you can never have enough strength to protect what matters to you, you know.

damn right~

[WHAT HAPPENED maybe rahzel keeps a little locket with his afro-potential hair...god nevermind hopefully not. They will be best friends ;;

with only his head sticking out, not even his hands. Just leave him there forever, water him occasionally. she still needs church, though
him too
this is his penance]

[symphonise]

it's not inhuman if it's what's always been.

don't get in over your head. going past your limits hinders more than helps.

[ the monkey dies of natural causes: old age (so it's assumed). DON'T BE CREEPY, RAHZEL. They'll be the cutest and best of friends, and they'll tell each other they like each other until the end of their dead days.

baroqueheat would burst into flames if he stepped into a church, and nonon never needs church. or not that kind of church. a different kind of church. ]

[witchplz]

but if you at least gave them their weird anime socks or whatever, they'll work doubletime, maybe even triple. probably.

that's kind of my specialty~ don't worry, don't worry, i can handle it.

[OH THANK GOD still thats sad. ITS NOT CREEPY ITS SWEET!! their days wont end in those fields in valhalla. never again.

hopefully he'll already be in there when the flames start, sitting next to a little old lady who's giving him the stink eye. and when he ignites, she smacks him with her purse not only to take out the flames but his Flame of the devil. ok satsuki's church counts, fine]

[symphonise]

is that what your business model is? i'd give them stylish socks, and they'll have to live with it.

if you get sick, i won't take care of you.

[ they will live again!! somewhere someway somehow.

baroqueheat deserves a feisty old lady to smack him into submission. ]

but the POINT of my messages is are you going to be with your boytoy all day tomorrow?

[ she means when AREN'T you going to be home, but she can't show her real intentions. ]

[witchplz]

stylish anime socks? or else they'll cry. but they'll be grateful when you turn off the heating in the winter. no my business model is silk things, of course.

no, no, i wouldn't expect that. but i do expect you to come with movies and a little mask over your face so you dont catch anything while you marathon crappy movies with me.

[be careful or he might grow to like that? is that...is that the way to cure him? is that his biggest weakness? old lady terror? WE'VE DONE IT]

OK OK i'm going to be at my place w/him probably sometime in the afternoon but i'll be out and about in the morning getting ingredients. to answer your mysterious question~

[symphonise]

there's no such thing as stylish anime socks. don't insult me. silk is acceptable.

we won't marathon crappy movies. we'll marathon horror movies.

[ NO ONE can stand up to old lady terror. it's in some holy book somewhere surely. ]

got it. it's not mysterious, only curious. don't get sick with your boytoy!

[witchplz]

there is too! gundams, for example. i'm nooott~~ silk is A+++

OOOOH! thats even better! i'm SO GAME!!! and we'll get lots of popcorn and candy and laugh till we almost puke but don't actually puke because we're too mighty for that.

[yup hes fucked, possibly literally]

hmmm mysteeerious~~ i won't, i won't! we'll be fit as horses. thanks for worrying about whether i'd be lonely or something <3<3 i hope you have fun plans too!! and if not, i'll drag you out somewhere after

[symphonise]

don't tell me you're a mecha nerd. i don't know if i can accept this.

[ Rahzel's cool points are starting to disappear.... ]

you might puke if you're sick, but we should have a horror movie night no matter what. you don't need to get sick first.

i do have plans. i'll be chaperoning the dance at the school. how fun it is depends on the people there.

[witchplz]

ew, no way!! i know someone who could be one if i do my research correctly, thats all. i try to be understanding on the outside while having goosebumps on the inside of disgust.

i'm not gonna get sick! i've been working way hard and the last time i got sick was so long ago! why are you assuming i'm gonna get sick? don't underestimate my body's fighting power, dammit. but the movie night is definitely a go, YES

OOOOH....i hope its a lot of fun! dont spike the punch ok~? as funny as it'd be, you'd have lots of puke on the horizon

[symphonise]

i call a nerd a nerd when you see a nerd.

[ Everyone she cares about back home is a huge nerd, so she might not mean it quite as insulting as she wants to make it sound. ]

people who don't know their true limits get sick. it's a tried and cliched trope, and it's life. should horror movie night be us two, or should we extend it to whoever thinks they're as cool and strong as us?

i don't need to wrangle drunk teens when they're already dumb enough. no thanks.

[witchplz]

they do seem to enjoy the name dont they, as much as they protest.

i cant say i'd agree with you when i started my journey from home, but i do agree now. somewhat. i'm still going to push myself to get stronger, but i'm more confident and know what i'm doing. so dont worry <3 annnddd it could be a fun way to discover some fraidy cats, but do you want to deal with screaming during the movie? i dont mind if you want me all to yourself either way~~

think about those impressionable brain cells, thats right!

[symphonise]

they should embrace the future.

screams can be a splendid addition to any soundtrack, but it can wait until our next horror movie night. we'll do the real horror movies for just us and lower the intensity a degree for the general public.

you're too nice to say they all have brain cells.

[witchplz]

not TOO much or they'll call themselves the Zaku clan or something

RIIIIGHT~? especially with something sweet to eat to accompany it. thats a good idea, i like that the best! the public will thank us for not scaring the ghost right out of them, too. and our training is super secret, anyway~

well i'm sure most of em do! they're just....occupied with things that we just don't understand. probably

[symphonise]

that's true. we don't need a zaku clan.

popcorn and chocolate is the best combination! the warmth of the popcorn melts the chocolate a little, and the sweet and salty mixture can't be beat. what if i want to scare the ghost out of them, though? scared people are the funniest.

that means they're hopeless.

[witchplz]

nope. we'll have to go all SEEdlings on them.

have you tried chocolate covered bacon? its completely sinful but oh MAN is it good!! i want you to give it a try and you and me'll definitely eat all the popcorny chocolate we can stuff ourselves with~ but if you scare the ghosts out of them they'll have no control over their bowels.......so we should do this at your place <3 this is true they are funny.

for now. but they'll mature

[symphonise]

you are making a nerdy reference on me that i don't understand. don't go all otaku on me, sidekick.

chocolate-covered bacon sounds like it'll clog up my arteries, but bacon chocolate chip cookies don't sound like they're dripping with grease. [ how does that even make sense... (the answer to nonon is just add sugar.) ]

we remove their bowels. no problem.

will they?

[witchplz]

why i NEVER! i wouldn't, not in a million years. i just keep up to date on these things so i know how to manipulate- i mean cooperate better.

that honestly sounds like cement for the arteries, way worse than chocolate covered bacon! chocolate covered bacon is like mild whereas those cookies are MUY CALIENTE when it comes to calories. i'd totally try them.

but where would we store them? also what if they call the union

they will! with time and a little luck and someone at their back. they will